Sunday
Aug092009

When Men Wait For Sex: Dumb like a fox

Dear Duana, I’ve had a lot of luck with women, sexually speaking. But I’ve also gotten bored and restless pretty fast afterwards. I’d like to find something long-term with the right woman, and I’m considering waiting to put on the moves. Everything in my body and half my brain says I’m crazy to even think it. Am I the only guy with this issue? And is waiting for sex ever smart for a man? Dear Kyle: Yes, I hear the voices, too—The Genes Of Your Ancestors are screaming your insanity for putting off ‘til tomorrow what and whom you could be doing today. But you’re not crazy. And what you’re suggesting is dumb like a fox…

Click to read more ...

Friday
Jul312009

Dear Kindle Subscribers: A letter to readers from Amazon.com

Dear Kindle Subscribers, I cannot thank you enough. Yesterday, just six weeks into its Amazon launch, Love Science became the top-rated, best-selling blog in Amazon.com’s Lifestyle & Culture/Life & Love category; #1 in Relationships; #1 in Behavioral Science; and #5 in Science as a whole. Thanks to you, Research-Based Relationship Advice For Everyone is becoming a reality.

Click to read more ...

Monday
Jul272009

Put A Ring On It: Trial separation versus trial marriage  

Scientifically speaking, here’s what most women think at move-in: “I wonder when we’re getting married.” And most men think: “I wonder what’s on TV.” Ironically, women are choosing cohabitation now more than at any point in prior Western history—hoping for marriage while doing the very thing that undermines the likelihood of getting it. Be warned: Science shows that most men are inherently more reluctant to commit, and moving in before setting the wedding date hurts your chances of ever having him Put A Ring On It. But there’s still something you can do; here’s what and why.

Click to read more ...

Sunday
Jul192009

Commitment--Or Lack Thereof: The trouble with shacking up

“No. Not just no, Heck No!” Wise Readers, that’s what you felt about a Pete/Tina shack-up, per the recent Folk Wisdom inquiry. Through it, 41 readers anonymously submitted advice about a real couple in their mid-20’s with three years of dating and a desire to move in. But whereas Tina saw cohabiting as Engagement Lite, Pete viewed it more like a car lot—where test driving now can prevent owning a lemon later. Yet the majority who advised against a Pete/Tina move-in tended to approve cohabitation generally. Which brings us to a deeper question: Is cohabitation helpful in general—for most people on the path to choosing a mate?

Click to read more ...

Monday
Jun222009

Folk Wisdom: Should they shack up?

Folk wisdom—the accumulated knowledge of regular people—is what most of us really use every day to make our decisions. Which means it’s Important. Often, there are several folk wisdom answers for any one scenario—and social science tells us which of the many possible answers will actually work for most people most of the time. So I’m going to give you a scenario from time to time, and ask you to write back with your advice about it. Then, in a later article I will summarize your answers and give the advice science supports. Ready? Here’s the survey link for this week’s scenario, where your responses will be anonymous: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=hsNlRau4oQu8j_2fv1W8KTQA_3d_3d

Click to read more ...