How To Forgive An Affair (He Won't Admit)

Following my recent tip-off about Henry’s two-year infidelity with a colleague, he ceased contact with Anne, joined me in therapy, and apologized for endangering our marriage. But he won’t admit he had an affair, or tell me anything about it! He insists Anne was “just a good friend” he never mentioned because he didn’t want me upset. Well, I’m beyond upset. Why is the truth so hard for him to tell? And (how) can I forgive him—for my sanity and our unity and our family?

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Masturbation + Marriage = ?

My fiancé and I haven’t had sex with each other, but I *masturbate every day. I’ve always felt guilt about it, and now I’m worried it will ruin my ability to please my future wife. How do I stop? Dear Albert, I’m touched by your concern for your future wife’s sexual happiness, and honored you’d let me lend a hand as you prepare for your nuptials. But perhaps instead of stopping your own masturbation, you could consider encouraging hers…

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What To Do When She's Not (Ever) In The Mood

Dear Emma,When you asked how to locate your libido, the scientific answer quickly emerged: There’s no widely/wildly successful solution. And among our Wise Reader survey respondents, 27% of the men and 81% of the women struggle(d) with their own low lust. Turns out, research indicates that reviving the drive is about as straightforward as female sexuality itself. But despair not. The many possible *causes* of absent or low desire mean many possible *cures*—including these:

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Q&A for "Save Our Sexlife (DIY sex therapy when your guy has ED he won't treat)"

Wise Readers, Going Stealth to treat a lover’s ED (when he won’t do it himself) spawned many personal revelations and quite the discussion. What are the many —sometime surprising— causes ED? If it’s this common, should we even call it “erectile *disorder*”? And can you screw up recovery by rushing the process? Read on!

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SOS: Save Our Sexlife (Or, Do-It-Yourself sex therapy when your man has erectile disorder he won't treat)

Dear Duana, for two years, Erik’s had erectile dysfunction he won’t discuss or treat. Eric says is he’s “fine” with how things are. I think it’s closer to truth to say he’s anxious and would rather shut down sexually than be crushed by trying something that doesn’t work. Is there a way to resume sex of *some* sort with the man I love and married?! Dear Cassandra,I hear your frustration, but I’m not a sex therapist. I could claim to be—in most of the USA, *anyone* can. Ye olde local psychological association can often direct you to someone reputable, but even then, therapy involves something Erik’s avoiding: talking. So you might have to treat Erik’s ED* under-the-radar, and here’s how:

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