FAQ—Frequently Asked Questions
What makes Love Science different from other relationship advice columns?
—Love Science is the only relationship advice column that uses scientific research findings as a basis for the advice given—rather than politics, religion, clinical experience, life experience, or opinion alone.
Who is Love Science for?
—It’s for anyone—of any age, marital status, sexual orientation, gender, race, nationality, religion or political persuasion—who wants to know not only what to do and how to do it, but the scientific why behind the advice.
For example, if you want commitment from your sweetie, or you need to improve your marriage with a “difficult woman” (or man), you could ask your friends or turn to another column for various personal opinions. Or, you could Ask Duana, who would give you the relationship advice that, based on scientific research findings, has worked for the majority of people the majority of the time.
How can I receive notification every time a new column is posted?
—If you go to the “Follow @” section on the left-hand side of any page of the LoveScienceMedia.com website, you’ll find clickable tabs for RSS, Facebook and Twitter. If you click for RSS, the new columns’ titles will auto-feed to you. If you click for Facebook or Twitter, Duana will let you know via her status line every time a new column is published. (Warning: Facebook will give you all Duana’s personal status updates, not only Love Science updates. If you want *only* the links to new columns, follow her at Twitter.) Or, if you prefer, you can just return to this site every week or so.
—Readers who use the Kindle Reader can also purchase this blog for a nominal fee at the Kindle Store on Amazon.com. Here’s the link: http://www.amazon.com/Love-Science/dp/B002BSH39A/ref=cm_cr_pr_pb_t. Click once on “subscribe now with 1-click”, and it’s yours. From then on, every new column will be auto-delivered to your device as soon as it’s published.
Where did the author get the idea for Love Science?
—“Notice I’m not using my own lovelife as the basis for the advice!” says Duana. Having made almost every possible relationship mistake, Duana began reading social science research to help herself in 1996. It worked for her and, eventually, for her clients. In 2008, an editor for a woman’s magazine suggested Duana create a column, and in February, 2009, Duana launched Love Science as a pilot project on Facebook. After piloting several columns there, she opened this site in May of 2009 so that the public at large can have free access to over 50 years of valid scientific relationship information. “It’s time for this information to help everyone; it can change lives, and it was mostly just gathering dust” she says.
The author often responds to the commentors. Is this normal?
—Such responses are unusual, but, says Duana, “When I piloted the first columns on Facebook, there was such a great community of responders. The comments and discussion after the posts were more interesting and helpful than the posts themselves—that’s where readers told me what information they still wanted, how the information fit with their own lives, and how I could answer their concerns more completely. My goal is for that to continue here. I want this to be a place for you to find a way to more satisfying relationships—it’s not just about intellectual curiosity. So please leave your comments, and let’s keep the discussion going.”
Are there rules about leaving comments?
—Yes. “One of the major, repeated research findings about long-term love is that respect is the single most important factor in whether relationships last happily or die an ugly death. For that reason, it’s important to practice respect in all human interactions,” says Duana. “Readers can disagree with me or with those leaving comments, but the disagreements need to be expressed respectfully. Obviously, this rules out hate speech, swearing, and bullying.”
Can I leave a comment anonymously?
—Yes. Although the comments form beneath each article asks for your name, email address and URL, you may leave the email and URL spaces blank, and insert a pseudonym for your name.
How often are Love Science columns published?
—A new thread is posted every two weeks, with a Q&A about the prior week’s topic posted on the off-weeks. Occasional shorter pieces may be posted more often.
Why aren’t Love Science columns published more often?
—“I am an avid nerd and love doing this research, but it does take time to find the answers to readers’ queries,” says Duana. “Also, I hope this gives everyone time to get into commenting about what you’ve read, and also gives a bit of time to apply the information to your life if it’s right for you.”
How can I get my question answered?
—Email the author at Duana@lovesciencemedia.com, or use the Ask Duana page on this site. Whether or not your question is used for a column, she will make every attempt to address your concern.
Is my email address being maintained for spamming later on? Will it be sold?
—No. No matter how you contact the author, your personal and email information are secure. You won’t be spammed, have your email address sold to a third party, or receive an email or call trying to sell you something.
I want to Ask Duana, but I’m worried the people I’m writing about will figure it out. Help!
—If your question is chosen for Love Science, Duana will change your personal and other identifying information, and will edit your letter before publication. The people you care about will not know for certain that you wrote the letter unless you tell them.
Are the letters that are published in columns real? Or does the author make them up?
—The questions come from real people with real concerns. However, Duana edits them to remove identifying information, and to make the letters brief enough for publication. Sometimes, Duana wants to write about an important issue that nobody has asked her about. When that happens, she launches a column without a letter.
Are there any topics that are off-limits in Love Science?
—Yes. Topics that aren’t about some aspect of love relationships aren’t covered. But any topic that is related to love relationships is fair game, as long as science has addressed it in some way.
Is there a book about this?
—Not yet. Duana is authoring Love Science and working towards a book simultaneously.
There are a lot of male readers on Love Science. Why?
—Most relationship advice columns are read primarily by women, so it surprised us to find that Love Science is read by men and women equally. Comments from men indicate that they want and enjoy relationship information as long as it’s got a valid basis. They find science valid.
How is the author’s first name pronounced?
—Duana is pronounced DWAY-nuh. Two syllables, long “a”. It’s a Gaelic name meaning “little dark one”. “A lot of people say they like my name,” says Duana, “but I notice none of them ever use it for their children.”
Some people call the author “Dr.” Is there a reason for that?
—Duana Welch, aka Duana C. Welch, Ph.D., Dr. Duana C. Welch, and Duana, has a doctorate in scientific psychology from the University of Florida (1998), and served as a professor in the psychology department at Cal State Fullerton from 1998-2004; she’s now professing at Austin-area universities. “Doctor” is the customary title for professors holding a Ph.D., and in class, that’s what Duana is called. Outside of class, though, Duana prefers to be called Duana. It’s not as if a lot of other people are going to answer to her name, after all.
Is Duana a therapist?
—“Thankfully, no,” she says, “I see a real need for therapy, but it’s neither my training nor my passion.” Duana has over a decade of experience as a relationship consultant, however, wherein she uses her basis in relationship science to help singletons prepare for, find, and commit to a life partner.
Why doesn’t Duana talk about God in her columns? Is she a heathen?
—“LOL!” says Duana. No, Duana isn’t a heathen. She’s been a religious and spiritual person all of her life, and does not see that changing. However, as she puts it, “There are already quite a few places where a person can get religion- or spirituality-based advice, so I feel that’s already being addressed admirably. Susan Page is my favorite author from that standpoint. Bonus: science backs up much of what she says.” (Susan Page’s most recent book of this kind that Duana recommends is Why Talking Is Not Enough: Eight Loving Actions That Will Transform Your Marriage
Why doesn’t Duana talk about politics in her columns?
—“Science does not give us answers that fit neatly into any particular political agenda. Although I’m politically Democratic, science has changed my mind on many issues,” writes Duana. “For instance, marriage is not just a piece of paper; sex is rarely free of attachment, especially for women; and children are frequently devastated by divorce. On the other hand, gay parents (adoptive or biological) produce straight children as a rule; sexual orientation is not a choice, especially for men; and non-violent pornography does not wreck lives and create a nation of sexual deviants. I’m here to report what the science would advise us to do, no matter what that is.”